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| Culprit | The Real Thing |
| Title | You To Me Are Everything |
| Year | 1976 |
| Written by | Michael Denne and Ken Gold |
| Submitted by | Siegfried Baboon |
There's "something of the Barry White" about this song, and if I ever hear it playing, I know I'm somewhere I shouldn't be, like a wedding, or Budgen's. Although it cries out for an obvious truck driver's gear change, it's so incompetently executed that you almost don't notice it's there. The keyboards seem to decide to change of their own chord, while the bass is too busy doing other things; and the vocals lamely take up the new key, seemingly for want of anything better to do. There are no mitigating circumstances whatsoever.