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| Culprit | KPMG |
| Title | KPMG (As Strong As Can Be) |
| Year | (Date unknown) |
| Written by | Some odious songsmith(s) at the behest of the multinational corporation in question |
| Submitted by | Pad |
Perhaps the definitive corporate anthem, this nauseating paean to global strategy oozes saccharine production values and aspirational lyrics that would make even the most committed company man think twice before joining in. I've no idea who actually wrote it, but I vaguely remember reading somewhere that KPMG's head office disowned the song, passing the buck onto a subsidiary in the Netherlands. If anyone actually admits responsibility, I'd be amazed.
In keeping with the song's general "stick to the rules and don't rock the boat" approach, symbolising the one-size-fits-all stamp of corporate culture, we encounter the truck driver's gear change in all its glory during the repeated choruses at the end of the piece. It's the final nail in the coffin for their "dream of power and energy".
Related stuff
"KPMG (As Strong As Can Be)" first jumped into public consciousness (well, on the Internet at least) after its inclusion on Chris Raettig's (sadly now defunct) corporate anthems website. For a while, the legal eagles at KPMG threatened to sue him simply because he had included a link from his website to theirs. This ludicrous notion is detailed in a story from Wired which was published at the time.
I apologise for the low quality of the MP3 here; but I'm sure you're not missing much, really. Last time I checked, the Wired story had a link to the whole thing, if you think you can stomach it.